Have you noticed how you are influenced by the sense of touch? Were you surprised at both the subtle and more intense responses that are evoked? If you followed the suggestions in our earlier lesson this week, you reached a new awareness.
I am keenly aware of the bonding created by touch and sound and sight in my interaction with one of my cats. Dilly, our handsome tuxedo cat, is now quite elderly and ailing with many illnesses. Despite his frailty, I know that he responds in a positive way when he sees me, hears my voice, and when I touch him. In his condition now, this is the most important connection I can offer. We are both nourished by these acts of love.
It seems that we have reached a time when physical proximity with those we love and care about is often impossible. At one time, most families and friends remained in the same communities for their whole lives. Now family members and friends live in other cities, states and even in different countries. How do we “touch” each other? One of my friends uses the term “touching in” when she communicates by email. Under certain circumstances, it may be the best we can do to touch each other. While it is probably better to speak on the phone or “Skype” one another with visual contact, this is not always possible.
You can still “touch” each other through words and thoughts of kindness, support, concern, and love. It is better to do this than nothing at all. Here are some ideas:
- Send a card or letter to someone you love. It is almost a novelty now to use “snail mail.” One of my friends writes long letters on a regular basis. She is an artist, so she includes drawings and other expressions of her artful way of “touching” others. We are made happy whenever we see that something has arrived from Linda.
- Communicate by email or by other means. Forward a funny photo or an meaningful quote that will bring positive energy to others.
- For someone you want to “touch” when you are not present, ask someone to be your messenger, maybe a spouse or a caregiver. Some years ago, when my elderly mother was living with us, we went on a trip that would take us away for some time. A person who helped us as a caregiver for my mother stayed with her the entire time. Before we left, I purchased special cards, each with a handwritten note, to be given to Mom each day. My husband had a long-standing joke he and my mother shared. Each day he would secretly give her a piece of saltwater taffy, something she enjoyed. I say “secretly” because the idea was that I did not know about this; I had a kind of reputation for serving “healthy foods.” So, while we were gone, our caregiver gave mother a piece of taffy from Richie, her secret taffy agent, everyday. At least this was a special way of “touching” Mom with a special remembrance to cheer her. Oh, and a hug was to accompany all of this.
Be creative. And, by the way, don’t forget yourself. Book a message if you can. Reach out and touch others whenever possible. Touching goes two ways. Or maybe even more ways — how about a group hug?
With love and namaste, Deanne
Fro more writings, go to http://www.deannemincer.com.